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Living with A Dysmorphic Disorder – What’s Going On and How to Cope?

I want to discuss image dysmorphia.

I’m struggling with it.

My distorted image makes it hard for others to give me proper advice. No matter how many times someone tells me that I am not the way I see myself, I still see a different person in the mirror.

My “friend” in the mirror sees all of my flaws. She also hides my clear image. I literally can’t see my real self unless I give myself a side-eye. Then, my “friend” will quickly distort the picture before I can fully process what I just saw. It’s frustrating to know you can’t see yourself, but your own mind will not let you change your distortion.

Sometimes, I wonder if I can see any bit of the reality that others see. Sometimes, I wonder if they are wrong, and my truth is right. Sometimes, I just know I am right. Sometimes, I know I am wrong.

When I take photos of myself, I look at them in disgust. I see flaws in every part of my body and mind. This leads to thoughts of self-deprecation. When I question myself, my “friend” hisses to shut-up because I am the one that knows nothing. I am stupid. I sometimes ignore her, other times, I fight her, but most of the time, I cower away too afraid to lose another battle.

I can look in the mirror, and I can see many things that I hate about myself. My “friend” makes me believe that everyone can see what I see and hate me as much as I hate myself. I can unconsciously (thanks to my “friend”) seek out specific people who with 100% certainty will validate what she has been telling me. She can’t be wrong if other people believe it too. It is a cycle that is tricky to break.

No matter how much I protest or try to protect myself from her evil thoughts. She is there, waiting for me to be weak. She comes in like a savior but leaves me as a sinner. I hate her, but she is me, so I love her too. My self-image is split and shattered. I live with this for most of my life.

So, there are so many ways my story could have gone. My path is twisted and hilly. I still rely on her to tell me, “like it is” when I don’t know the answers. She always comforts me with her evil banter.

However, it has gotten better. I can stand my ground and have won a few battles. The war still rages, and my reality will forever be distorted, but I go on. With every battle won, I hope to be closer to my truth.

Here are some ways that help me win my battles.

Get Help / Seek Out Positive People

When you see yourself as an awful person, you attract people who think the same about you. Try to find a couple of good people in your life and be honest with them. Tell them that you are trying to conquer a demon and need a supportive friend. This can be difficult at the beginning because your judgment in others may be off. If you can afford it or have the resources, seek professional help. They will help you learn the tools and guide you into accurately finding the right type of people that you need to surround yourself to maintain a healthy environment.

Say at least 3 things you love about yourself.

Many people struggle with this and only focus on the negatives. Sometimes, you have to stand for 30 minutes before you can come up with something. However, this is what you need to do.

Look at yourself in a mirror.

I avoid mirrors as often as I can whenever I look in the mirror I just think negative thoughts. Now, I try to focus on other things apart from what my “friend” thinks. It helps me to stop thinking so negatively about myself.

Look at yourself as though you are someone else.

I’m the type of person who often sees the good in everyone. I can look at someone and instantly see good qualities about them. I realized that I had to see the good in me. I had to see the positives about myself even if that means looking at myself as though I am another person.

I can look at others and think how great they are as a person. It helps me to realize that people look and act differently. We are all beautiful and unique.

So, why can I be the same too?

Stop comparing yourself to others.

Comparing yourself to others, you first have to learn to love yourself. You have to see how you look genuinely. Sometimes, it is tough to do. Especially when I feel that person has everything, and I have nothing to show. I start to turn on the negative faucet and pour it all over myself.

When I catch myself doing this, I turn it off. I stop looking. I stop trying to understand why they are so “great.” I try to focus on myself and what makes me “great” or what “in” nature is beautiful at that moment. One of these two mental exercises does pull me out of my head.

So, these are some exercises to help me to learn to love myself. You will be able to say good things about yourself. That initial haze of feeling stupid and vain will start to fade out. This is just your “friend” trying to stop you from seeing your truth. You will begin to pick up the habit of counteracting some of your thoughts and distortions.

If you spend most of your time, your thoughts and your energy on your body shape and flawed mind, you won’t indeed be happy. It takes so much energy and time out of your life. You need to let go of the obsessive thoughts and learn to love yourself and to live life.

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Blacken Matcha Detox Tea

I decided to share an impromptu recipe for a delicious detox tea.

I had an upset stomach this week. It was like everything I ate had no taste. I also couldn’t stomach most things. Desperate to find something to help my sour tummy, I concocted a recipe for a matcha detox tea. It may or may not have helped, but I did feel better a couple of hours after drinking it.

It also tasted amazing.

I had all the ingredients in my pantry, so for something so good. I didn’t have to pay a ton of money.

I hope you enjoy this tea too!

Dry Ingredients:
1/4 tsp of activated charcoal
One packet or 1 teaspoon of matcha
1/3 tsp of turmeric

Wet Ingredients:
1 cup (8 oz) of hot water
A dash of ginger
1 tsp of agave nectar
Ice cubes

First, I mixed the dry ingredients into the hot water. It doesn’t matter the sequence, but I added the matcha, then the charcoal, finally the turmeric. I stir until the dry ingredients are dissolved.

Secondly, I had the agave and ginger to the mix. I blend until it is well combined.

I let it sit for about two minutes and stir the tea again.

Finally, I mix in the ice cube and stick the glass in the refrigerator until it is cold or I am ready to drink it.

That’s it!

It is a yummy treat for my ailing tummy.

Please let me know if you have an ice tea drink that you love to have during times when you a sick or just relaxing. Please leave a link in the comments below.

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I Got Myself Out of Bed Today

I have been afflicted with depression for some time. I usually can pull myself out of it to be somewhat functional. It is hard to get yourself motivated when you feel like the world is dark and closed to you.

Sometimes, when I am walking down the street, I see a group of people enjoying the day. They are smiling. They are laughing. They are in their moment. I try not to compare myself because depression can hide in one of their smiles. However, I still compare the laughter.

I wanted to share some of the ways I get myself ready to start the day. Depression can be a severe matter. If you are spending multiple days in bed, feeling hopeless or wanting to end things, you need to speak to a professional. They will help you see through the fog. My advice is what helps me to get me started for the day. I hope it helps you too.

A routine is my secret weapon to getting out of bed. Usually, when I have a routine, I find myself more motivated to get up and get things done. Even when I want to stay in bed, knowing I need to do a chore will help me push myself out of the blankets.

I like starting my day by doing a self-care routine. This means making my bed, washing my face, brushing my teeth, and having a healthy breakfast. This routine gets me going. I do it every morning. While doing this routine, I also try to think of one thing that is positive for the day. This also could mean, “What do I look forward to doing?” It’s become so much of a habit, that I can pretty quickly figure out a pleasurable moment, like noticing my teeth look really clean, or I get to spend some time outdoors on a sunny day.

I feel like every time I exercise, I get a little more motivated to move throughout the day. Even when I do not have the energy to move, I do a couple of uncomplicated stretching exercises. Sometimes, this alone can get my endorphins pumping, and before I know it, I end up doing the whole workout sequence.

Finally, I go and do my work, I may still feel a little down. However, by having a stable routine, it motivates me to move on throughout the day. I think having healthy habits are like small lights that help break through the fog of my depression.

It doesn’t matter how I feel I know I have to accomplish my morning to-do list. You have to create these habits to trick your depression into not controlling you. Your morning list does not have to be big, it can be two or three small items to motivate you to get out of bed.

I may not be those laughing people, but my small accomplishments do provoke an inner smile. I feel lucky enough to see them having a good time. Habits change you. Positive patterns can help you reach your goals. Even if it is just getting out of bed, keep doing them.

I hope you found this a little helpful. Let me know how you go in and blast through your depression so you can function throughout your day.

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My Spiritual Self Care Routine

A new month is nearing, and I thought I would share some ways that I was practicing self-care and healing last month.

I enjoy connecting with the natural world by acknowledging this valuable Earth and its resources. I do not attempt for perfection in my journey, even now.

I know that some people are ready to jump into self-care and self-development but might feel overwhelmed with where to start. I hope that I can share more acumen with all of you.

Go Barefoot:
Earthing is the practice of shoeless walking. It feels good to go barefooted and do this with confidence, without craving the acceptance of others. I feel grounded on this Earth and get the sensation that I do belong on this planet and this Universe.

Breathe Mindfully:
I often hold my breath and looked tense when things get a little rough. I have experienced more emotional security and calm after following different breathing techniques. Mindful breathing allows me to be more in the present moment. It helps me better cope with my anxious feelings.

Healthy Nourishment:
I drink celery juice and smoothies every day, and I also take supplements. When I support myself entirely through nourishment, I can extend the same to those around me. I try to promote joy not only for myself but for all living beings.

Try Yoga:
I practice yoga. I don’t focus too much on the perfection of my form, but more so on my breathing and the awareness that I feel in my body and mind. I try to stay mindful even through the discomfort.

Connection through Meditation:
I started meditating about ten years ago. I was not able to focus in the beginning. It took me a few years to be aware of my breath and posture. I try to keep up with my morning prayers. I also express affirmations daily when I meditate. I do this to unite with the divine being and my spiritual self.

I’m grateful that you stuck around to read what I have shared.

Please let me know if you have practice any self-care routines in May, and how did you feel about it? Do you intend to continue self-care or start in June?

I hope so!

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Here is a Question: Why minimalism?

A question that seems to have become repetitive to me since I’ve turned to a minimalist lifestyle has been, why minimalism?

Such a question is only natural when others recognize the fact that you’re straying from the physical development of society and stepping away from conventional views in buying and owning objects.

Before I answer the question, why minimalism. Let’s first determine what specifically minimalism is really about. It’s a reassessment of your priorities so that you can strip away the excess material. Contrary to what many people may believe minimalism is, it is not solely about getting rid of your possessions. It’s also about reassessing your life and the things in it such as ideas, relationships, activities, and possessions. It’s looking at reducing those things that do not hold any priority. I believe minimalism is about becoming more intentional with both my belongings and all the different aspects of my life.

Here are a few of the reasons why I chose to embrace a minimalist lifestyle.

  • I’ve decided I want to be more selective about the things that I bring into my life.
  • My mind was scattered all over the place, and I can never seem to focus on one thing at a time.
  • My apartment was getting filled up with clutter. I was getting sick and tired of having to look at it and deal with the disorder every day.

It just made sense for me at the time to look into minimalist living. I’m living in a studio apartment, so I already didn’t have many things. The things that I did have was just an accumulation of miscellany in clutter that I’ve just accumulated over the years.

I understand that for the majority of people, this is not a sensible thing to consider. You may not be able to pack up everything and get rid of it all at once. I suggest for you is to really analyzing what you do need and what you can probably live without and go from there. Little by little, just getting rid of things until you finally feel like you’re in a point that you are content.

Although minimalism may not be for everybody. I’m glad that I’ve chosen to implement it into my life because the benefits it brings me never seemed to cease. My mind is clearer. I spend less money. I use my time on only the
things that bring me value. It just makes sense to me to live this lifestyle.

I know that it’s easy to say “do it,” but even small actions can add up. I hope you found this helpful. I would love to know what you do or how you feel about your practice into minimalism.

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The Five Minute Gratitude Exercise

Gratitude turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity…it makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” ~Melody Beattie

Gratitude is directly related to optimism, which makes people content with their lives. When we are grateful for what we have, we can feel the gratitude in our hearts and be aware of our feelings. This practice is an excellent tool for our mindfulness exercise accessories. When we feel intense emotions such as anger or frustration, we can get caught up in those emotions. Gratitude helps us handle those emotions by shifting our thoughts from anger to thankful.

Learning gratitude is such a valuable tool that can be used at any moment throughout your life. This super simple daily gratitude habit will help you be grateful every day (and it only takes 5 minutes).

I take a moment throughout my day to figure out what gratitude means and why it is essential. Then I visualize what I am grateful for the moment; I start to have a dialogue to why I find it necessary. I find that my five-minute gratitude journal can help me express what I am thinking and help to understand why I appreciate it. It is also a beautiful keepsake to have when I am having a rough day, and I can’t think of anything to be grateful for in my current moment. Lastly, in my gratitude exercise, I beath. I find that a breathing exercise at the end of a session will help to emphasize what I thought wrote or thought in my heart. I generally feel more at peace after my practice.

Gratitude makes us feel more appreciated. Thinking of acceptance is why a five-minute a week gratitude journal can make us so much more content. The sincere appreciation produced by during those five minutes is small, but the emotions of gratitude felt during those five-minutes are enough to trigger a grateful spirit.

I hope you enjoy this little piece if you have any suggestions on how to practice gratitude. I would love to read it. Please let a comment below.

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You are a Limited Resource

Hey you!

Did you realize that you’re a limited resource?

There is a no different person on the earth like you. You deserve to be known not just by those in you but by the most significant being in your life— you. Practicing self-love may be challenging for some of us, particularly at times when we face difficult challenges. It’s not about state self-absorbed or narcissistic, it’s about having a feeling with ourselves, our well-being and our passion. We learn self-love so we can go through our limiting beliefs and live the time that really shines.

My hypothesis works like this: Self-Love is the solution for growing into productive and running towards our goals. Self-Love is this motive we want to adapt to move harder with our relationships and self-betterment. Self-Love can really make us where we need to get in life. I believe Self-Love may be the solution for halting Anxiety and unhappiness (which be a lot more prevalent today) before they start.

That self-love does not mean getting soft on ourselves always, speaking to ourselves at sugary consolation, or being gentle hearted. As a matter of fact, I’d reason self-love is the opposite. Self-love, and knowing our creation, is about being dominant. It’s like the strength you can get out and strengthen. It’s the means of being weak, opening up, being compassionate towards ourselves, and being able to go through the uncertainty and bad feelings that do so well.

Self-love is not about being too balanced and intrigued with this idea of me or mine. Self-love involves a paradigm change that requires being able to feel connected to the power much higher than our specific self.

Make the image a try and see how self-love gains in your life. You are your own resource and love the comes from you will affect your world and those in it.